Weekly Update From Councillor Guy Lambert

Gets excited after discovering Viagra down a side alley


Guy Lambertguy.lambert@hounslow.gov.uk

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So this week has been a bit on the hectic side, retribution for 2 weeks sunning myself I suppose.

Thursday, after a morning spent blogging, was quiet until late afternoon, when I was up at Heston War Memorial with the legendary HAGs (Heston Action Group). In this case it was two male HAGs and we spent an hour or so wandering around Heston unearthing those corners where waste accumulates, such as behind the flats above the shops opposite the war memorial, in middle aged blocks of flats and in the hideous alley that runs behind the shops on Vicarage Farm Road. What would the Vicar say? It was good to get recyclers, planning enforcement, locals and a dumb councillor to try and work out together how to tackle these. Miracles are not expected despite my presence and the Vicar looking on benignly from wherever he ended up.

Planning in the evening. Nothing humungous. We deferred another proposal for Hounslow Heath Golf centre and approved a house rebuild in Chiswick that neither me nor the 2 Chiswick councillors liked. However I doubt even the Tories are going to take a lead from the ‘Prime Minister’ and either die in a ditch or lie down in front of bulldozers to stop it. We approved Brentford FC’s redevelopment of their training ground on the green belt in Osterley even though I argued for less parking and a comrade argued for more.

On Friday I met some consultants who are advising on ‘Realising the Borough’s Economic Potential’ This is mainly about how the council works with business and was a most interesting discussion, most of which I have obviously forgotten (refer to previous remarks about sieves).

Later I met a resident with council tax arrears. This was the classic case of not really grappling with things until the bailiff’s knock is heard on the door and lurid red letters come through it. The resident is now determined to get matters sorted and we’ll be looking to agree a settlement/payment plan with the council over the next few weeks.

Over the weekend I finally ploughed through my email backlog and the concentrated on my family life backlog – cooking brunch for my daughter who I hadn’t seen for several weeks.

On Monday morning I’m up in Enfield Road. I have had a number of complaints about a sudden epidemic of parking tickets. It seems people have been parking (unlawfully) on the kerb since the time of the Battle of Hastings but it was only now that people were getting shot in the eye. Or more accurately their cars were getting shot in the windscreen with parking tickets. Of course I’m not allowed to get involved with parking tickets but I regard this as a policy matter and have made some representations to the traffic team.

Then it’s the little alley next to O’Riordan’s pub on Kew Bridge Road – or is it the High Street? – which ever since I have been a councillor has been punching well above its weight in the mess tournament. We agree a new bin regime and I get hot under the collar about street cleaning there. I’m told it is now pristine though haven’t inspected yet. I am moved to remark that giving up flytipping may alleviate erectile dysfunction.


Then I go to Hounslow House to meet Samia Chaudhary, lead member for parks, to discuss the problems caused in Boston Manor Park by the Junction 2 festival and how to ensure the park is fixed very quickly and further problems avoided.

On Tuesday I am due to attend an event about women in the Met Police but as I withdraw Pegasus from his stable I find his front hoof is poorly. I remove it and try to remove the shoe so I can fit a new inner tube but after half an hour of cursing I get into the car and take it to the ever-efficient Halfords!

Then into Hounslow House for my monthly meeting with finance (everything stable) and then the Cabinet meeting in the evening. I present the quarterly performance review for the Lampton companies – the first time we’ve reported in this way. Everything under control but we’re entering a new era with a new chair of the main company board just installed and a new MD about to be recruited.

Wednesday afternoon I visit Lionel School, who have again collected an astonishing amount of food donations for the FoodBox. They had room to display less than half of it. Always fun to be in a packed school hall and the children put on a remarkable display of singing and proved they know how to spell!

Foodbox donations

After that I have a brief foray into door knocking in the most attractive Reynard Mills estate – the first time I have darkened those fairly new doors – before heading off to Chiswick for cabinet question time. Very well chaired by local dignitary Andy Murray (not that one) and lots of questions from a small but perfectly formed audience including much of the awkward squad (AKA Chiswick councillors). I am grilled about the cyclists’ nightmare known as Grove Park Gardens. It was supposed to be resurfaced in August under the Pothole Pledge but was delayed because one of the utilities wants to do their worst. I commit to communicating a firm date when it will be done.

It’s now early Thursday and I’m about to cycle off to the Strand. More next week.

PS Sunday's litterpick starts opposite McDonalds at 11am and moves up Ealing Road.

Cllr Guy Lambert

October 17, 2019

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